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April 28, 2013, 3:30 AM (comment)

My diet has been horrible for the past...for my whole life LOL. Especially last week anyway.
I'll start from the most recent to the least recent junk I've eaten. Yesterday I was so hungry because I woke up late and I had to meet my friends at the mall immediately so I bought Mrs. Christie Ahoy Chunks chocolate chip cookies box. When I came home, I couldn't stop eating these bad boys because they tasted so good and I missed my sweet snacks (I normally prefer savory snacks). I tried restricting myself to only finishing one row of cookies but eventually, throughout the evening/night, I ate all but one. Considering that I really did eat all of the cookies, I did the calculations and I ate over 2000 calories that night. Okay, so on to the next junk food, two nights before buying the chocolate chip cookies, I bought a bag of Lays BBQ chips. It was no surprise that I finished the whole bag by myself because I've done it so many times in the past! They will always have a place in my heart :'). Anyway, the whole bag was about 1300 calories. Few days before, I went to McDonald's and I got a McFlurry Oreo flavored, which was already 570 calories...and the day after it, I got something else from McDonald's. I was taking the bus to my mom's and suddenly I realized that I took the wrong bus so I got off and went to a McDonald's to use their wifi (to relocate myself and check the bus schedule) because I only have an iPod. Since I felt bad just coming in to use their wifi, I bought small fries. Those salty heart attacks are so tiny, yet they're probably around the 300's or more.

Ugh would you just look at these??

Was it really necessary to list the food that I ate? To summarize this, I just wanted to say that I've been relying too much on junk food because I'm using food as a comfort. I don't feel like there has been something majorly depressing happening to me. I'm blaming my cravings for crap because of PMS, teen hormones, school, and myself. Additionally because of me not being so much active and not drinking lots of water, I've gained weight fast. Not that much but I know that if I continue at this rate, then changes will be obvious. And it also sucks that I'm obsessive over my physical appearance because this doesn't help me with feeling any better; more stress on self-image. You think I can use that excuse to stop eating junk right now? Well it's kind of hard because food is always #1.

oh dear, I'm actually getting so sleeping as I'm typing this because it's 3am......

I'll just...replace my snacks with healthier snacks like pistachios. Or may not. Maybe I'll just get a high cholesterol level and clog my arteries and bloat my face with sodium and get zits from chocolate and waste all calories into staring into the computer.

 Wow it's almost 4...gotta get my beauty sleep you know.
By the way, one of the reasons why I'm writing about this is because I'm a hungry cat.

 End of food rant.
April 22, 2013, 12:25 PM (comment)

*Post is fairly boring but feel free to read it

I feel like I haven't updated this for a while due to procrastination and nothing to write about but now that I'm feeling like I can write something, I decided to take the time to talk about my week.

Originally I was going to make a post on my birthday, which was on the 11th of April, to express my opinion on uhm birthdays but I got busy pretending to be busy (I turned seventeen by the way :D). It was on a Thursday and Thursday nights are the most stressful for the students at my school (or for many people) because projects and homework are due by the end of the week. Ah..the funny thing is that on that week, it was midterms so could you imagine how stressed I was? Haha, no. I wasn't as stressed as I was 'depressed'. It's one of those times when you feel super emotional from building up all small negative things inside of you. This is why I don't like being a female! Females are very emotional to many things and we cry too much and we need love yet we deny that we need it...? Whatever, so on that Thursday night that I was supposed to do homework for midterms, I did nothing at all because I wasn't organized in terms of what to do and managing time. The next day, my family and I celebrated my birthday. I feel bad for my mom because I didn't show any signs of gratefulness when she made lasagna and did a homemade cake for me. I was still feeling bad but 3 days later I explained to my mom that I really do appreciate and love her effort during my birthday and I apologized. To be honest, turning 17 wasn't a big deal at all! I even almost forgot that it was my birthday the next day until some friends wished me through texting 'happy birthday'.

Aside from my birthday, I became emotionally stable again. However, after going on a small trip to Ottawa right before my birthday, I lost the habit of at least doing homework twice a week. For two weeks in a row I haven't done homework... I'm not sure why... Maybe it's because of Tumblr, Youtube, and MangaFox? But even when I was doing my homework after school, I would still use these websites to entertain myself! The good news is that I did homework on a Friday night. How strange is that??! I think I'm steadily going back to doing homework so that's good :). Alright, enough about school! /bcmostpplhateit

On Friday I went thrift shopping with my two friends to see if we could find treasures. We found nothing exceptional until we walked pass by some old radios. There were brown boots laying beside them and we took a look at them. We thought someone forgot them but the tag was there and it was only $15. My two friends freaked out because the sole of the shoes is labelled GIRL MADDEN and I was clueless of what the heck that brand was. They said that Girl Madden might also be Steve Madden (I was like whatever and I went along with their excitement). I decided to purchase them because they matched my feet size and the price was alright :D. They look like this:

I'm pretty happy with this purchase because I always wanted troopa or combat boots! But man, I spend too much money this month on clothing. It's okay, I'm forgiven (by myself) because it's my birthday month <3.

When I went to Ottawa, I went to Winners with my sister and I bought two shorts, and a black skull top. The lace shorts were $19.99, the one with the patterns was $15.99, and the shirt was $12.99. Since each pieces were under $20, I thought that the outcome would be cheap but noooope; it came to a total of $53.34 with tax. I told myself that I have spent enough so I really thought that clothing shopping was done for this month. Later on this month, I went to Talize with my friends, to a decent thrift store. I got the boots, and I got the black jacket I'm wearing in the outfit below. And then, the next day, I unintentionally went shopping (because I had to buy bras for my mom). I went in Sirens and I decided to try two pieces of clothing, one was a pair of leggings, the other was a shirt. The leggings were so comfortable and light! And the t-shirt was so pretty! It had that cute pocket in the front! So I ended up guiltily buying both :(. The total for all of the clothes that I bought this month is.......DRUMS rolling (while I calculate)... $150.01 (LOL, one cent)! Okay, this is mind blowing to me because I used to hate shopping!! And I never thought I could spend that much on clothing, in-a-month! I need to say this: holy crap. That's also how much I gain from doing the dishes in 15 weeks... Maybe this isn't such a big deal but to me, it is, because I don't have a job yet.

How do you like my vintage kitchen?

Hmm, that's about it for this week. Oh! And I also got new glasses :D! They're not expensive Michael Kors frames so it's cool. The style reminds me of...a classier version of the wayfarer glasses.

Photoshop skillz

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April 8, 2013, 9:19 PM (comment)

I'm just going to update with a small review of the BOY LONDON sweatshirt I received today in the mail. Oh, by the way, I am supposed to be working on English. Oh well xD;;

This is the third thing I've ever ordered online! The first one was a green drawstring jacket from YesStyle and the second one was from eBay, another green drawstring jacket (I just wanted to test the legitimacy of eBay hah). So far, this is my favorite purchase because of the price, the shipping, and the comfort.

As soon as I got home from school, I ripped the package apart to find this bad boy (a pun for BOY LONDON, get it? :p yesnomaybe)! It took right under two weeks for it to arrive, which is pretty good for free shipping! The total costed me like $25. Originally, it was worth $30 but I used a 15% off code. The sweatshirt turned out to be bigger than I thought since the website stated that it would be a one size and one size is pretty small in Asian countries. The bottom of the shirt covers my bum and the sleeves extend to my fingers' mid-joints. It's no big deal because large/baggy shirts can easily be styled with leggings or shorts (if you tuck them in). The comfort is like...omg. I haven't had a shirt that comfy before. I describe the feeling as...refreshing and light, but not cold! This is because the sweatshirt is big and the material is similar to a light cotton t-shirt. But it's not made of 100% cotton and I don't know because there's no etiquette inside the shirt.
Sorry for the mess of my room! On another topic, how do you like my wall decoration?

Overall, I'm pretty happy with it! Just gotta be careful with washing it because the logo seems like it can be pealed off easily. Happy Monday and here's the link.

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April 3, 2013, 2:24 AM (comment)

Ugh goddammit, I decided to stay up this late to finish my English project (it's 2am) and I still haven't touched it! Not one bit. AHHH! I guess it doesn't matter because I'm planning to do an all nighter or sleep at 6am because I'm going to miss two days of school Thursday and Friday. So I decided to finally make a blog to rant out thoughts and share things :D! Well turns out my first post will be about school because it's been bothering me for quite some time.

I am not really liking high school because of several things like the fact that I'm behind by 4 credits; our school has a self-paced program where students can submit their work anytime and you can even continue or finish a subject onto the next semester. Well shit I totally messed up in Grade 9 because by the end of that year, I finished 5 credits instead of 8 like everyone else. I have a major problem in terms of time organizing and of doing my homework in general. My single mom never forced me to do homework at a younger so I'm unfortunately not your typical, Asian, disciplined kid.

Anyway, the next thing that really sucks in my high school life (so far), is the clique that I hang out with. Oh my god, we're all Asians! I'm not trying to contribute this to more stereotyping but I feel so pressured, indirectly, to have good grades and to be being on track. Thinking about it again actually doesn't sound too bad because one should get good grades and be on track! However, that's not what's bothering me about my group. Okay, let me tell you about the history of my group (as far as I know).

The group was first 'made' in Grade 9 (2010-2011) because we were all newbies and since Asians are shy and not outgoing most of the time, we kind of just gathered at one table during cafeteria break. We didn't all know each other but one person would at least know another person. Then, the first drama happened. Holy crap, I didn't do anything but whatever, it happened lol. I don't know how to exactly explain it nor if I even know the whole story but me and 3 other friends were 'kicked' out of the group. Now, I don't blame the person who caused the drama because everyone has their personal issues so...yeah. But! The rest of the group never did anything to help solve the conflict or to even do something y'know. Like what kind of fucked up psychological thing was happening at that time?? Although this is a very exaggerated example to use, that reminded a lot of that time when Wang Yue, a two year old toddler, was run over by a van TWICE in 2011. Despite such horrid accident, several people passed by and ignored the bleeding-to-death baby! And again, I apologize for using such a sad example but I'm pretty sure I can extract something in common from Wang Yue's incident and my group's separation.

Since I find this to be such a big deal, I can safely admit that I secretly (LOL) hold a grudge against the group as a whole, but not as individuals though.

So, the following year, I found myself to have my first period class with a girl from my old group. I felt so uncomfortable so I didn't dare interact with her until she nicely approached me. We helped each others with math and we talked over about what happened last year. I was really happy to know that she thought it was stupid as well because I thought that everyone was the same in that group. Yes I was judgmental and I still am. Back on topic, she convinced me and the group and everyone else involved to make up...and we did. But it would never go back to the way it was because some of us that were kicked out already made their permanent group. Nevertheless, I felt better.

Until the end of Grade 10 that is. So, same person partly responsible for the drama #1 got super upset at me because I tried to help her with her problem (to her it sounded like I was taking control of things meh). No, that's not even what bothered me the most. What did was that he whole group knew about it! They all knew why she was mad at me, all, except for little Chanda. No one told me! Instead, they just...continued with their normal habits. Wtf! I knew something was wrong so I had to force one of my friends to tell me what was happening! I still don't even know why it sounded like a freaking taboo to confess to me! I feel like I could tell more about the group but I really have to start on my homework.

Biased conclusion: I am a judgemental person who does not like half of her 'friends' at school because they're all...backstabbers? That's too much of a harsh word but I can't find another one :/.

Okay so that was all for my first post. I hope it didn't sound too boring cuz I wrote a chunk. If you've read this far, thanks for the view :)! Until next time~ (no boring ranting hopefully)

Waiiitt! By the way, sorry for the swearing words! I usually don't use them unless I talk about a subject that has made me upset in the past.

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